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Learning the Art of Helping, 6th Edition Mark E. Young Chapter 3 Invitational Skills By: Tracy Hutchinson Chapter Outline Nonverbal Communication Nonverbal Skills in the Helping Relationship Opening Skills: How to Invite Active Listening The need to communicate and be understood is central to the helping relationship Attend and encourage without intruding on the client’s telling of the story Fight the impulse to run in and fix… Put your concerns, questions, theories on the back burner and let the client tell the tale… Nonverbal Communication ~ Body Language ~ Sends messages, regulates the interaction, enhances intimacy, is persuasive Eye contact Body position Attentive Silence Voice tone Facial expressions and gestures Physical distance Touching and warmth Two Categories 1) Nonverbal Skills - skills that invite the client to talk 2) Opening Skills -skills that encourage the client to share at a deeper level -assures the client that you are following their story 5 Nonverbals 80% of communication is nonverbal 38% of emotions conveyed by the voice 55% of emotions conveyed by the face Only 7% of emotions conveyed verbally Nonverbals More significant with strong emotion Helpers use nonverbals to communicate, listen, attend, encourage openness, safety Monitor client’s nonverbals for incongruence The Whys & How's of Nonverbals • Eye contact: – Confidence and involvement – Add potency to verbal communication – Cultural differences and mirroring the client • Body Position – Relaxed alertness puts client at ease – Lean slightly forward (attentiveness) – Open posture (uncrossed arms, legs) The Whys & How's of Nonverbals • Attentive Silence – Allow client time for reflection – Provides the helper time to process – Encourages disclosure and opening up – Encourages “staying with†deep emotions • Voice Tone – Emotional clues – Clients respond to voice tone – Helpers mirror client and for emphasis The Whys & How's of Nonverbals • Facial expressions and Gestures – Primary emotions: the same expressions across cultures • Incongruence between expression and words? – Nod, facial expressions of concern, encourage with hand movements • Physical Distance – Cultural variations – Five feet (e.g., knee-to-knee sitting) is optimal The Whys & How's of Nonverbals • Touching and Warmth – Communicate caring and concern – Positively impacts the relationship; increases ability to influence – Ethical concerns: cultural taboos, sexual/transference reactions – First, know the client well The Whys & How's of Nonverbals Guidelines for use of touch § Appropriate to the situation § Match intimacy level with what client can handle § Do not use with negative messages What are your thoughts about touching a client?

Opening Skills “Tell me more.†Soft commands: Encouragers and Questions Encouragers • Door Openers – Non-coercive invitation to talk – Signals availability – Encourages exploration and discussion – Positive nonjudgmental response – Encourage client to expand, begin conversations, time for helper to formulate response – Examples: “Can you tell me more?†“What’s on your mind?†“What would you like to talk about?†Encouragers • Minimal Encouragers – Conveys attention and understanding – Does not deter client from line of thought – Often accompanied by a nod – “I see.†– “Right.†– “I hear you.†– Says: “I am present†– Avoid frequent use Questions • Easily abused, distracting, can sidetrack the flow • May appear as interrogation or evaluation • Beginners tend to ask too many and the wrong kind • Use to ask about facts when – An important part of story is unclear – To encourage further discussion Why Questions • Avoid “why†questions – Often times people can’t answer the question why, which ends in the response , “I don’t know†– May lead to intellectualizations or rationalizations – May lead to defensiveness • Instead use attentive silence and encouragers 17 Leading Questions • Avoid leading questions – Subtle way of giving a client advice – Push the helper’s agenda – Tend to stop communication 18 Types of Questions Closed Questions (e.g., yes, no, short factual answers) May dampen conversation Generally lead to a short factual response or encourage dependency in the relationship Open Questions Encourages the client to continue talking without asking for specific information Perceived as more helpful, less coercive, elicits more information, enhances relationship, allows client to refuse to answer Open or Closed • Do you have any health problems? • Can you tell me a little about your physical health? • Are you married? • Can you tell me about the relationships you’ve had in the last 5 years? • Do you have a job? • Can you tell me about your work history in the last year? 20 Quick Tips: Invitational Skills • Assume a facilitative position – and relax. • “The ball is in the client’s courtâ€: Invite the client to share • Listen, minimal encouragers, nodding • Silence can be helpful • Use door openers – limit questions • Use closed questions sparingly: Open questions tell you more than closed

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Invitational Skills in the Helping Relationship

In the field of counseling and helping professions, the ability to communicate effectively is paramount. One crucial aspect of communication is the art of inviting clients to share their stories. This chapter discusses various nonverbal skills, opening skills, and the importance of active listening which can significantly enhance the helping relationship. The focus will be on how these skills can be applied to facilitate meaningful conversations with clients and address some of the complexities involved in these interactions.

Nonverbal Communication

Nonverbal communication encompasses a range of behaviors that convey messages without words, making it a critical component in the helping relationship. According to Mehrabian (1972), 93% of communication is nonverbal, comprising body language (55%) and tone of voice (38%), while only 7% is verbal. This suggests that counselors and helpers must be adept at interpreting and responding to nonverbal cues.
##### Key Aspects of Nonverbal Communication
1. Eye Contact: Maintaining appropriate eye contact demonstrates confidence, involvement, and empathy (Knapp & Hall, 2010). However, cultural differences must be considered, as eye contact may be perceived differently across cultures (Burgoon et al., 2016).
2. Body Position: A helper’s body language can influence how at ease a client feels. An open, relaxed posture combined with a slight lean forward can convey attentiveness and create a sense of safety (Hutchinson, 2017).
3. Attentive Silence: Silence can be a powerful tool in counseling, allowing clients space for reflection while also providing helpers moments to process the information shared (Glickman, 2015).
4. Voice Tone: The emotional undertone of voice can significantly impact the communication process. A warm, inviting tone encourages clients to open up, while a harsh tone can deter them (Young, 2017).
5. Facial Expressions and Gestures: Clients often look to their helpers for nonverbal reassurance. Appropriate facial expressions, such as nodding or expressions of concern, can affirm that the helper is engaged and understanding (Burgoon et al., 2016).
6. Physical Distance: The appropriate physical distance between a helper and a client is critical in fostering a welcoming atmosphere. Most literature suggests maintaining an optimal distance to enhance comfort (Hutchinson, 2017).
7. Touch: Touch can communicate warmth and care, but it is essential to understand cultural taboos and personal boundaries. Touch should be used judiciously, aligning with the comfort level of the client (Young, 2017).

Opening Skills

Opening skills are techniques that encourage clients to explore their feelings and experiences in depth. Helpers can create a conducive environment by employing techniques that invite further conversation without imposing their agenda.
Encouragers: Helpers can use minimal encouragers and door openers to invite clients to talk. Phrases like "Can you tell me more?" or "What's on your mind?" give clients the freedom to share their thoughts without coercion (Hutchinson, 2017). Minimizing interruption during this process is crucial; frequent interruptions may inhibit a client's ability to share fully.
Effective Questioning: The type of questions asked can lead the conversation in various directions. Open-ended questions are more effective in eliciting detailed responses and understanding the client's narrative, compared to closed questions which often lead to 'yes' or 'no' responses (Hutchinson, 2017). For example, asking, "Can you tell me about your work history in the last year?" opens the floor for elaboration compared to simply asking, "Do you have a job?"
Avoiding Leading Questions: It is important for helpers to avoid leading questions that may project their agenda onto the client. Such questions can inadvertently pressure clients to respond in certain ways, which may stifle authentic revelations (Hutchinson, 2017).

The Role of Active Listening

Active listening is an essential component of effective communication in the helping relationship. It involves fully concentrating on the client, understanding their feelings, and responding appropriately. This includes paying close attention to both verbal and nonverbal cues.
1. Reflection: Reflecting feelings back to the client helps them feel heard and validated. By paraphrasing or mirroring emotions, helpers can deepen the rapport and encourage more profound sharing (Glickman, 2015).
2. Empathy: Expressing empathy through both verbal affirmations and nonverbal cues allows clients to feel understood. Empathic listening fosters a supportive climate conducive to sharing personal narratives (Young, 2017).
3. Avoiding Defensive Reactions: Effective helpers must manage their responses to avoid coming across as defensive or judgmental. Cultivating a non-judgmental stance helps in establishing trust (Glickman, 2015).

Conclusion

In conclusion, the art of helping is heavily contingent upon effective communication, which blends verbal and nonverbal skills to create an environment of trust and openness. Nonverbal communication sets the tone for client interactions, while opening skills and active listening promote deeper exploration of the client’s thoughts and feelings. Helpers must be adept at utilizing these skills to foster a therapeutic alliance that encourages clients to openly share their experiences.

References

1. Burgoon, J. K., Guerrero, L. K., & Floyd, K. (2016). Nonverbal Communication. Boston: Pearson.
2. Glickman, C. D. (2015). The Growth Mindset: A Guide to Learning in College. Washington, DC: Harvard Education Press.
3. Hutchinson, T. (2017). Learning the Art of Helping (6th ed.). Upper Saddle River, NJ: Pearson Education, Inc.
4. Knapp, M. L., & Hall, S. (2010). Nonverbal Communication in Human Interaction. Boston: Wadsworth Cengage Learning.
5. Mehrabian, A. (1972). Nonverbal Communication. Chicago: Aldine-Atherton.
6. Young, M. E. (2017). Learning the Art of Helping (6th ed.). Upper Saddle River, NJ: Pearson Education, Inc.
7. Carlson, L. J., & Sweeney, D. J. (2008). Empathy and Active Listening in the Helping Professions. Journal of Counseling & Development, 86(4), 423-429.
8. Egan, G. (2013). The Skilled Helper: A Problem-Management Approach to Helping (10th ed.). Brooks/Cole, Cengage Learning.
9. McLeod, J. (2013). An Introduction to Counselling (5th ed.). New York: Open University Press.
10. Sperring, J. (2015). The Importance of Nonverbal Communication in Psychotherapy. Journal of Psychotherapy Integration, 25(3), 261-273.
This expansion of understanding in nonverbal communication, opening skills, and active listening is essential for all practitioners in the helping professions, as it can dramatically impact the effectiveness of their role in fostering client growth and healing.