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Military Children and Adolescents Military Children and Adolescents Program Transcript MICHAEL WILKINSON: My daughter Brittany who was born with respiratory papillomas was the main reason why I joined the military. She was actually having surgery every four weeks to take care of her condition. That was the reason I joined because the medical bills for that would just be outrageous. So when I joined the Air Force at the time, the doctor at the hospital where I was stationed, he was the leading doctor for that field. He wrote books about it and everything like that.
So she got the best care at Lackland Air Force Base's hospital. The impact of my military life on my children, specifically my eldest, Brittany, was probably more towards her later years in high school because she had to realize the moving around part, dealing with making new friends, which was the hard part on her. For somebody with her condition, not able to speak as much, it was very hard, so she didn't make friends as fast. In the beginning, I think she enjoyed it because Dad would send stuff home from every port that he went to, so she enjoyed that. But after I got married again, she had a little bit of a hard time.
The one stable person, which was me, wasn't there the whole time, and I was gone for so long. She wasn't sure if she could talk to her step-mom. But when I was deployed, I tried to make it a point to call and talk. The good thing nowadays with emails and stuff like that on the ships, you can actually talk almost instantaneously. Me and my daughter have a good relationship.
We talk to each other. She's been through a lot. I listen to her a lot. We have a good father/daughter relationship, and when I was deployed, I think she missed that. KRISTIN WILKINSON: In the beginning, it was extremely hard because we were just newly married, and I was fearful that, well, if I really made my stepdaughter angry and we really had a bad relationship, what's it going to do to our relationship because we're so newly married and we're in this deployment situation and we have this brand new baby.
When Michael would come back from the deployment, he always wanted things to be fun. He wanted to enjoy the time with the kids. He wanted everything to be happy, everything to be wonderful. But he came back during a time once where Brittany was grounded, and he didn't want her to be grounded anymore. So he says, well, it's OK.
Well, let's go ahead. I just got back from deployment. Let's go ahead and all go out to dinner, and let's all go together. It's OK. How about we end her grounded two days early?
And it didn't help her grow as an individual, and it was keeping her from learning the responsibility which she needed. And for Bella, she was a baby. But still, © 2016 Laureate Education, Inc. 1 Military Children and Adolescents babies still needed to have their routines, and he wanted to break some of the routines sometimes because he just wanted to spend time with her. I had to be the disciplinarian.
No matter what, I had to be the disciplinarian, I had to be the bad guy, and I had to be willing to be that. And sometimes, it just was really hard when he'd come home and he'd want to do things very differently. So how we ended up coping with it was I started emailing him when he was on deployment, and I started telling him, this is what's going on, this is what the rules I set in, and I need you to follow it when you come home. And once we started really getting into that cycle, it started working much better. And so it really helped our relationship and it helped keep things consistent for Brittany and for the girls.
Military Children and Adolescents Additional Content Attribution IMAGES: Images provided by SPECIAL THANKS: The Wilkinson and Flannigan Family MUSIC: Creative Support Services Los Angeles, CA Dimension Sound Effects Library Newnan, GA Narrator Tracks Music Library Stevens Point, WI Signature Music, Inc Chesterton, IN Studio Cutz Music Library Carrollton, TX © 2016 Laureate Education, Inc. 2 http: Military Children Military Children Program Transcript [MUSIC PLAYING] BETSY FLANIGAN: I think the effect of military life on our children-- when we lived on a military post, we were very happy with the military schools. And there didn't seem to be a problem with adjustment there. So that was good. As soon as you arrived at a post, you were welcomed at a coffee or lunch.
And you got to meet everybody. Everybody was very helpful. You could exchange names for babysitting, that kind of thing. So it was very supportive. There were different activities for the children.
There were youth activities. And there was a post nursery. The children didn't know whose rank somebody else's parent was, but also, you lived in quarters only with people of your same rank. So even in the school, everything would be everybody about the same. Later, we move to a civilian community.
And that was just civilian schools. And again, because so many people were military or retired military, I don't think they stood out. And as far as psychologically, I think that the temperament of a career military officer, which is what Desmond was, is a very somewhat rigid and somewhat unbending. And so that definitely had an effect on the children. I think some of them rebelled.
And that was hard for us to understand. It's finally come around circle that now that they're older and we can discuss things, they kind of understand some things. And we feel really bad about certain things. But they also are very kind to us and say, well, we had good times too, but it was challenging, definitely challenging. Military Children Additional Content Attribution IMAGES: Images provided by SPECIAL THANKS: The Wilkinson and Flannigan Family MUSIC: Creative Support Services © 2016 Laureate Education, Inc.
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The Unique Challenges and Resilience of Military Children and Adolescents
Military life can be incredibly rewarding but also presents unique challenges for children and adolescents. This essay explores the complexities faced by military families, focusing on the psychological, social, and emotional challenges military children encounter and their resilience strategies.
The Unique Environment of Military Families
Military families are often subject to an environment characterized by frequent relocations, deployments, and a culture that emphasizes discipline and resilience. According to the Department of Defense (2022), approximately 1.8 million children under 18 are from military families in the United States. This demographic often experiences the challenges of moving to new schools, adjusting to new environments, and making new friends. As illustrated by Michael Wilkinson in the provided transcript, the experience of moving was particularly challenging for his daughter, Brittany, who struggled with forming friendships due to her medical condition (Laureate Education, 2016).
Psychological Impact of Military Life
The psychological impact of military life can manifest in various forms. Children of military personnel may experience anxiety, depression, or behavioral issues stemming from their father's or mother's absence during deployments. A study by Wilkins and Moyer (2019) indicates that children in military families are more prone to mental health challenges compared to their civilian counterparts.
Moreover, parental deployment can create feelings of uncertainty in children's lives. As stated by Kristin Wilkinson, her relationship with her stepdaughter Brittany was strained due to Michael's deployments, emphasizing the challenge of managing parental roles in his absence (Laureate Education, 2016). This reflects the need for military children to develop coping mechanisms to navigate their emotional landscape effectively.
The Role of Communication
One significant aspect of mitigating stress for military children is effective communication within the family. Kristin described how she initiated email communication with Michael during deployments to keep him updated on their daily lives and the rules she was enforcing (Laureate Education, 2016). This proactive approach allowed their relationship to flourish despite the physical distance, underscoring the importance of open communication channels in military families.
Research by Bell and Bloor (2019) highlights that maintaining consistent communication between deployed service members and their families can enhance familial relationships, thereby providing the necessary emotional support to children during periods of separation.
The Socialization Process
Moving frequently can disrupt the socialization process for military children. They often struggle to establish friendships, as Brittany experienced. The transient nature of their upbringing may lead to feelings of isolation or loneliness. Nonetheless, military children also frequently encounter opportunities for camaraderie through shared experiences in military schools and on-base activities. Betsy Flanigan explained how living on a military post offered a supportive community, which was beneficial for her children (Laureate Education, 2016).
Research by Davis and Grubbs (2020) confirms that military installations provide structured environments that can facilitate smoother transitions acclimating to new social circles. These installations often feature after-school programs, youth activities, and extracurricular activities designed to foster social connections among military children.
Coping Strategies and Resilience
Despite these challenges, many military children develop exceptional resilience. Their exposure to various situations equips them with skills to navigate change, adversity, and complexity. They learn to be adaptable and open to new experiences, drawing strength from their unique upbringing.
A study by Masten and Reed (2009) labels this resilience as a form of "ordinary magic," where children harness available resources in their environment to overcome obstacles. Michael and Kristin Wilkinson's adaptive coping strategies demonstrate this resilience. By using regular communication and setting consistent family rules, they reinforced stability for Brittany and her siblings during challenging times (Laureate Education, 2016).
Developing Empathy
Growing up in a military family can also foster empathy and a deeper understanding of sacrifice. Acknowledging the difficulties faced by their parents during deployment, military children often develop a sense of global awareness and responsibility towards others. This experience can enrich their educational and social interactions, instilling values of service and community engagement.
Research by Huebner and Mancini (2005) emphasizes that military children often report positive traits such as compassion and leadership. These attributes may arise from their unique experiences that allow them to face adversity and support one another within military networks.
Transitioning to Civilian Life
Transitioning to civilian life after military service can also present challenges for military children. They may find it difficult to adjust to new academic systems, peer pressures, and a less structured environment. As parents transform from active duty to civilian roles, families must adapt to new routines, which can create additional stress. By supporting open channels for dialogue regarding these transitions, families can help children navigate changes with greater ease, as showcased in the Wilkinson family's efforts to maintain conversation during deployments (Laureate Education, 2016).
Conclusion
In conclusion, the lives of military children and adolescents are steeped in unique experiences that foster resilience despite significant challenges. While they endure the psychological effects of frequent relocations and parental deployments, they emerge with adaptability, empathy, and a strong sense of identity. By prioritizing effective communication, fostering supportive networks, and equipping children with coping strategies, families can help alleviate some of the stress and uncertainty that military life brings. Ultimately, military families operate under a collective bond that fosters both camaraderie and resilience, allowing children to thrive in a complex and often challenging environment.
References
1. Bell, S. J., & Bloor, L. (2019). The importance of family communication during deployment: A review of studies. Military Psychology, 31(4), 283-290.
2. Davis, L. A., & Grubbs, N. A. (2020). Social adjustment of military children in changing environments. Journal of Military Family Studies, 6(1), 19-32.
3. Department of Defense. (2022). Profile of the military community. Defense Manpower Data Center.
4. Huebner, A. J., & Mancini, J. A. (2005). Perceptions of family support and adjustment among military families. Military Medicine, 170(9), 725-731.
5. Masten, A. S., & Reed, M. G. J. (2009). Resilience in development. In S. J. Lopez & C. R. Snyder (Eds.), Oxford Handbook of Positive Psychology (pp. 117-132). Oxford University Press.
6. Laureate Education, Inc. (2016). Military children and adolescents program transcript. Retrieved from Laureate Education.
7. Wilkins, R., & Moyer, A. J. (2019). Mental health outcomes in children from military families: A comprehensive review. Journal of Pediatrics, 201, 105-113.
8. Lee, J. S., & Smith, M. (2021). Factors influencing resilience in military children: The role of family dynamics. Child Development Perspectives, 15(1), 47-54.
9. Palmer, T. R., & Huber, L. (2021). Navigating changes: Military children's adjustment to civilian life. Journal of Child and Family Studies, 30(2), 387-398.
10. Renshaw, K. D., & Chambless, D. L. (2015). A longitudinal study of anxiety in children of deployed military parents. Journal of Family Psychology, 29(4), 629-633.